ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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