D3 body, D1 cock
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize