i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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