no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
