Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
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