Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I fill condoms, not promises.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
