The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Boobs are out for the taking
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
