We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
