You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
