I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
