Rock
Scissors
Fuck
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
