I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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