Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize