So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
