In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
