Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
we're so committed to being not committed
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
