Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
