I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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