yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
