you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
