she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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