I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
