He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
