Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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