so explain again why im purple
no
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
