I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Randomize
