um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
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