Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
