ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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