Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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