ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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