susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
