was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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