I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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