Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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