It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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