i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
