no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
