Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
only you would photoshop your dick
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
