Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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