you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
