so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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