Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize