i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
splinters make it hard to masturbate
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I just found puke in my bra..
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
