idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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