Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize