Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
