My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize