You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
