now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
